Stories are the creative conversion of life itself into a more powerful, clearer, more meaningful experience. They are the currency of human contact. — Robert McKee

Earlier this week, Chris Brogan challenged his readers to write a post about the importance of story in their life. When I first saw the post, I knew I wanted to respond, because I believe story is a critical part of the narrative of our life. My experience is that we connect relationally through a story and sharing our experiences. I have asked the question here on my blog  several times…what story are you writing? It is up to us to write/craft the story that will be our legacy.

Chris asked the simple question: what is the importance of story in your life? Such a simple question…yet, I’m finding my response is so complex and very personal. It’s a series of stories that moved me to make Project Authenticity an organization. The story that started it all is Mukhtar’s story, it was hearing her tell the story in her own words, and seeing her resolve to change her life, not end it. Most recently, it was attending the Half The Sky event and hearing the stories of Woineshet and Sekena. It’s the stories that moved me to take action. Someone’s life story can be very powerful and a catalyst for change.

At Project Authenticity, we are working to help write a new story, a story of hope, happiness and community. Our goal is to help end the story of violence in developing countries, and to be a catalyst in helping the women in these countries write a new story…one about community. We will be sharing stories here, of women who have written new stories, who desire to write a new story, and our own story about the journey. We will also share the facts and figures, however, I believe that without a story they are just numbers on a page.

You tell me…what’s more powerful?

The statistics:
- As many as one in every three women has been beaten, coerced into sex or abused in some other way – most often by someone she knows, including by her husband or another male family member.

The story:
-Over the weekend, I learned of the story of a 13-year-old Yemeni child bride, who bled to death shortly after marriage. She was tied down by her new husband and forced to have sex. According to interviews with the child’s mother, police and medical reports she looked like she had been butchered.

For me…it’s the story. How about you? Are you willing to take Chris’ challenge? Would you like to share your story here?  Or a story that’s moved you to take action?

Technorati Tags: Authentic, Chris Brogan, Story

For months I’ve been contemplating a post on social and relationship capital and how it’s built and then how it’s spent. And after a trip to Memphis earlier this week, to see my mom’s aunt (my great aunt) honored at a ceremony where she donated her honors and awards to the University of Memphis it all became so clear to me.

Elma Neal Roane has dedicated her entire life to education and her students, I’m planning to profile her here soon so I won’t go through all of her accomplishments. She is recognized as a pioneer and leader in physical education and sports in the state of Tennessee.  She was head of the Women’s Division for sports at the University of Memphis from 1946-1976. The fieldhouse at the University known as “the house that she built” is named for her and I’m told it’s the only fieldhouse in the country named for a woman.

On Tuesday, there was a reception at Brister Hall, and it was  the formal unveiling of her awards, honors and papers both academic and athletic. There were over 100 people who came to see my 91 year old aunt, not the honors and awards. Everyone who came had a very personal story of how she had touched their lives.  I was in awe to hear the stories from young and old, all of them spoke of the impact she has made on their life.  A life of building relationships, participating in the community, giving back, not just with her money but her time as well. I have to tell you, in my mind, she is the embodiment of what Chris Brogan calls a Trust Agent, person after person stood up and talked about her integrity, the goodness that she worked so tirelessly bring to all of those who knew her and many who never knew her but experienced the fruits of her labor.  At one point during the day, she turned to me and said “Everyone keeps talking about all I’ve done for women, but I worked for the men and human rights as well. I stood up for anyone who needed to be stood up for as long as I believed it was the right thing to do.”

As things were winding down, I had the privilege of sitting alone with my aunt and just chatting. At 91 years old, she’s still a leader and still wanting to mentor and educate the best she can. And while she was thankful for the honor on Tuesday, I’m confident that what she enjoyed the most was talking to the people. She was genuinely moved that so many people gave up part of their day to come and see her. While we were sitting there I said to her, “I’m in awe of all the goodness you have created how did you do it?”  She responded:

“Everything I did, I did because I had a passion for it, not just the education but the students as well. I’ve dedicated my life to promoting fellowship, honor and integrity, and we need more teachers who are pushing that as well. That’s my passion, keep on keeping on!” (her personal mantra)

What I’ve learned from a lifetime of knowing my aunt, is that social and relationship capital is acquired through service, fellowship, and a deep passion for people. And it’s how we build and spend that capital that defines you, I watched on Tuesday as many accomplished people, some celebrities, got up and thanked my aunt for her service, and more than one said she was their hero. They were powerful moments, but she accomplished all she did because she loved her work and wanted to make the world a better place. She never gave any thought to what was in it for her, she fought hard for what was right in her mind, and with honor and integrity, she made sacrifices, had discouraging times but she always stayed the course. She used her capital to build leaders, pave the way for the future and for improving human rights.

My question to you is: what are you doing with the social and relationship capital you are building? Are you leaving a legacy of goodness? Are you working for what really matters most?

Technorati Tags: Audience, Authentic, Authenticity, Baboon, Brands, China, Chris Brogan, Collaboration, Community, Consistent, Courageous, Customer Experience, Determination, Educate, Elma Neal Roane, Elma Roane, Empower, Engage, Facebook, friend, give back, Goodness, Gratitude, help, Honest, Iran, Julien Smith, Kenya, Listening, Maasai, Marketing, Media, Mobilize, Mukhtar Mai, New Media Atlanta, People Matter, Project Authenticity, Reach, Research, Resonate, Social, Social Media, Social Web, Strategy, Target, Thankful, Transparent, Trust Agent, Trustworthy, Twitter, Whisper

Today, in honor of International Women’s Day, I thought who better to highlight than one of the bravest women I know who has made a tremendous impact on me. Her courage, and entrepreneurial spirit is a testimony that all things are possible if you believe, work hard and never ever give up on your dream.

Mukhtaran Mai – I’ve mentioned Mukhtar Mai before, her story of triumph and determination always moves me. Her brother was falsely accused of fornication. She went to court to argue on his behalf and was sentenced to the most severe form of humiliation in her culture. In the eyes of  her family and village her destiny was suicide. However and most importantly not in her eyes, she stood up to her attackers and demanded prosecution. The Pakistani government gave her $8300 compensation and she used that along with money from other donors to build a primary school for girls. The story doesn’t end there, she’s also built a high school for girls, runs a school for boys, she bought a van for the schools that is also the village ambulance and she has a herd of dairy cows that generate an income and help her maintain the schools. And in March of 2009….she married. I’m really in awe of this woman as when she set out to start the primary school she was unable to read and write and enrolled herself. While I think  Mukhtaran Mai”s story is tragic, it’s my hope that in the years to come that she is known for her leadership, entrepreneurship, courage, and the sheer goodness she has brought to Meerwala.

Mukhtar Mai’s story has had a profound impact on me personally in ways that I still struggle to put into words. I am currently working on a plan to put action behind the impact and to thank Mukhtar Mai….stay tuned as I will share that here.

So now it is your turn….is there a woman in your life who has had an unexpected profound impact? What’s the cause and effect of that impact? I’d love to hear your story and hers!

photo credit: Ronda Churchill

Technorati Tags: Audience, Authentic, Authenticity, Brands, Chris Brogan, Collaboration, Communicate, Community, Consistent, Courageous, Customer Experience, Determination, Facebook, friend, give back, Gratitude, help, Honest, Kenya, Listening, Maasai, Marketing, Media, Mobilize, Mukhtar Mai, New Media Atlanta, People Matter, Project Authenticity, Reach, Research, Resonate, Social, Social Media, Social Web, Target, Thankful, Transparent, Trust Agent, Trustworthy, Twitter, Whisper

At first glance, Lake Nakuru National Park in Kenya is a peaceful beautiful safari park. It’s best known for the thousands and sometimes millions of flamingos that make their home along the shore.  Recently, the park was enlarged so it could provide sanctuary for more than 25 black rhinos. Overlooking Lake Nakuru is a picnic area called Baboon Cliff. Aptly named because of the troops of baboons that live here.

During my visit to Lake Nakuru I had lunch at Baboon Cliff, prior to entering the picnic area my team was briefed to be “on guard” because the baboons could be very bold. (could be is an understatement) However, there was no amount of briefing that could have prepared us for what was about to happen.  It had been quite a morning seeing rhinos, hippos, vultures, lots of zebras and even hyenas up close and sometimes personal.  As we settled into the picnic area, within seconds, we were surrounded by about 25-30 baboons. Our guides had large sticks and were doing all they could to keep the baboons at bay. And that job quickly became increasingly more difficult.

Baboons are really crafty characters and work  together to distract tourists so the larger more aggressive ones can easily take whatever it is that they want. They gather together almost like a huddle, make disturbing sounds, as if they were formulating a plan. Then one or two come in close and do some kind of trick, or something entertaining while the aggressors watch carefully waiting for just the right time to make their move.  And it’s all fun and games until you are face to face with one of these scary characters.

From the minute we arrived the baboons were on their “A” game and some of their attempts to take our lunch were….well entertaining. There was lots of laughter and well admittedly some anxiety. Taking note of my anxiety one of the men on our team invited me to sit on a bench with him, promising to fend off any baboons that got close.  As we opened our box lunch and started to go through it, a huddle of baboons formed just about 25 yards away.  We had our eye on that huddle and then they dispersed. We all breathed a sigh of relief. After a couple of minutes, a baby baboon made its way over and began doing tricks, making sounds and before we knew it all of us were paying close attention to the baby. Then out of nowhere, the biggest baboon I’d ever seen was on top of Mike, wrestling him for his food and mine. In a matter of seconds, Mike was on his back, with the large creature on top of him. Everyone sprung into action even the other baboons. Needless to say, the big baboon got away with our lunch. And as quickly as he was able to spring into action, he was off and running with the bounty of his efforts. He took it over to where he had huddled up earlier and shared the spoils with the rest of his troop.

So what does this have to do with community and marketing? What’s the lesson here? It’s the power of collaboration and working together to accomplish a goal. It’s so amazing that the troop of baboons knew that unless they worked together, there was no way they would have been able to get a single morsel. It’s the same in our communities and organizations. As organizations find themselves running very lean collaboration is critical to overcome the challenges of today’s competitive landscape. The social web has made it easier than ever before to collaborate and overcome any barriers that previously existed. If the baboons can grasp the power of working together to achieve a common goal, how do we often miss that truth?

I think Margaret Mead said it best and interestingly enough after her time in Africa. “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it’s the only thing that ever does.” While she doesn’t mention it, the collaboration factor is is implied.  Even the animal kingdom recognizes they are more powerful when they work together. Are you harnessing the power of collaboration or do you think you can do it on your own?

Technorati Tags: Authentic, Authenticity, Baboon, Chris Brogan, Collaboration, Courageous, Determination, friend, Honest, Kenya, Project Authenticity, Transparent, Trust Agent, Trustworthy, Whisper

Social media is a powerful communications channel it’s opens doors, starts dialogs, creates relationships and often inspires, motivates….and much much more.  It’s the much much more that I’m writing about today.  I’m a little concerned that people are forgetting that authenticity paired with social media is not a license to be divisive, or tear someone down. The fact is rude snarky remarks can hurt and as Chris Brogan said it earlier today “there are people on the other side of the glass with emotions.”

In a sense. all of us are authors and everyday we write another chapter or two in the story of our life. That story is what others will remember about us long after we are face to face with them. Snarky comments are often remembered by the person on the receiving end even if they are thrown out in fun. Our social networking accounts are just as much a reflection of our personal brand as our resumes, the stories we tell and the work we do.

I’m not suggesting that we will never have disagreements, that we turn a blind eye to problems or that we not stand up for the people, products, or issues we feel passionate about. I am suggesting that we take a minute and consider how we are communicating.  Consider the fact that contentious communications don’t build community they tear it down and destroy trust.  I’ve written frequently that for community to succeed there has to be a tie that binds. Collaboration may be the secret ingredient…there’s power in numbers.

I’m reminded of a quote from best selling author and speaker Barry Neil Kaufman: “a loud voice cannot compete with a clear voice…even if it’s a whisper.”

How would your community describe your voice?  Are you dividing or conquering?

Technorati Tags: Authentic, Authenticity, Chris Brogan, Determination, friend, Honest, Project Authenticity, Transparent, Trustworthy, Whisper

Project Authenticity is really important to me and I have a deep desire to connect you to people and brands that are uniquely and genuinely authentic. The kind of people, that when you meet them your interaction is like a drink of water. I was asked recently where did you get the idea  for this blog and the fact is it’s been brewing for about a year, but I think the seed was first planted after reading Chris Brogan’s post titled Passion Drives Personal Brand.  In that post he wrote: Authenticity matters. It matters a lot to me as well and after this week I can tell you that I know for sure, it matters to Chris.

I had the unique opportunity to connect 1:1 with Chris this week at New Media Atlanta. My first conversation was one I thought would be short and sweet. He and I were at the same dinner, but at different tables. As folks started to dwindle, I saw a seat open right next to him, so I walked over to introduce myself. I had no agenda I just wanted to connect.  I wanted him to know that he inspired the vision for this blog, that I’d read Trust Agents and many times I found myself saying: you are so right! I wanted him to somehow know that I’m not a fan, I’m a believer.

That’s not how the conversation unfolded. We talked about a couple things and then he casually mentioned that he was still thinking about what he might write on his blog Thursday night/Friday morning.  I actually said: I know what you should write about…uh oh did I just tell Chris what to write about? When I said that, he leaned in…looked me in the eye and said: what? Before I knew it I was asking him to write about community. And he did….Feeling the community.

Here’s what I want you to know about my friend Chris Brogan….he’s more than a social media rock star.  He’s authentic, gracious, sharp-witted, smart and deeply committed to inspiring people to stop broadcasting and start connecting. I can tell you he loves his family very much so he’s not spending all this time away from them to gain popularity. Chris knows that change begins within and social media is a powerful vehicle to exact change. It’s not social media that will change the world and build community it’s people and how they make use of it. Chris has said many times: people matter…and he means it.

The rest of the story….

I saw Chris the next day, across a crowded room and I smiled at him and nodded. He made his way over and sat down. The first words out of his mouth were: how are you today? Not: did you see my post?

So…if you’re thinking about getting Chris and Julien Smith’s book Trust Agents please go and purchase it. Get the book because you want to to know how to make trust moves consistently, you want to be inspired and inspire others to be authentic and transparent, you believe communities are important. Someone once said to me that in order for a community to be successful, there has to be a tie that binds….get the book because you want to be a part of a community where the tie that binds is people matter. I’m asking you to get the book because I want to know more people like Chris…there’s not enough of them.

Technorati Tags: Authentic, Authenticity, Chris Brogan, friend, Honest, Julien Smith, New Media Atlanta, People Matter, Project Authenticity, Transparent, Trust Agent, Trustworthy